It's all About LOVE. Thank You Jesus for the Reminder!

This blog may be stating the obvious, but sometimes the "obvious" things need to be brought back into the forefront.  I had a nice little reminder of this the past week and felt it was worthy of it's own little blog post.  The topic is something we sing about, talk about, live for, basically it is all encompassing.  In a word, it is LOVE.

A couple weeks ago, while I was worshiping at church (Southland's in Brea), I had a vision.  Lately the Holy Spirit has been giving me a steady stream of visions and it has been so incredibly powerful and helpful in really bringing the Word of God to life in so many ways.  Usually the pictures will confirm something He is teaching me or will give me confirmation of what is even being said later in the sermons, which is amazing and affirming for my faith.  But on this particular Sunday morning the vision was of a giant hand simply writing "love" in cursive on a sandy beach.  I then saw all the grains of sand on the beach lifted up and the sand was suspended in a 3D type affect as it was surrounding me.  I could see through the sand and saw how infinite the stars were in the sky beyond the sand.  I knew in essence that God was giving me a picture of how all knowing and all powerful He was and how infinite His love is.  I thought it was a "cool" picture but in all honesty my reaction was not one of awe or wonder.  Instead I thought this, "That is obvious.  Of course God is all knowing and all powerful and He is love. That is just a fact!"  I mean, my heart was warmed a bit, but I have to admit that I was left with a question of what God was really trying to show me in that.  I have had some visions lately that I felt were just a bit more impressive to me.  Visions of revival with the fire of God falling, Jesus preparing a banquet table, the army of God arising, basically awesome and more awe inspiring stuff.  So to see the word "love" seemed a bit anticlimactic to me.  But I just took the picture and put it in the back of my mind for future reference.  Maybe there was something more He was trying to show me?  There usually is, and lately there seems to be a lesson of some sort involved.


Well, as the week continued I had forgotten about the vision.  I was drawn to listen to a few messages online by a man named Dan Mohler.  Dan has such a contagious love of Jesus and I really enjoy his testimonies.  He has countless stories of profound miracles, but the main point he drives home over and over is that all the miraculous gifts are certainly not the focus and they should be just a natural extension of us reaching out and being the love of Christ to the world.  As we go, we just need to BE LOVE. We need to love as He has loved us.  As I have been on a journey to "eagerly desire the greater gifts" and have even had some profound words for others given to me by the Holy Spirit, this was a much needed reminder at this point.  

I then remembered an encounter I had with a good friend a couple months prior.  Paul and I have a friend that is a Biblical scholar that enjoys debating scripture more than anyone else I know.  Although I enjoy a good debate, iron sharpens iron so it says, I often find it rather exhausting and futile at times. One night, after a rather long discussion, I had a vision of him.  I saw Jesus reaching to embrace him.  I shared this and I was surprised when he became very agitated, even angry with me.  He said, "That is so elementary!"  I just told him that it was "what I saw."  I can say I wasn't too surprised at his response, but I guess I was grieved because I thought that with all the striving to know the Word of God did he really KNOW Him and His love?  But as I was remembering this encounter with my friend, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the vision I had in church where I saw the word LOVE on the sand.  In a way Jesus was showing me His embrace by showing me the vastness of His love and what was my response?  It really was almost identical as my friend's!  I responded by thinking, "That is so elementary!"  The Holy Spirit has been so good at showing me all these little areas that need refining as of late.  Not always enjoyable, but part of the process and is rather funny if I can see the humor in it all!

So as "elementary" as it is, I am now seeing, learning, feeling, experiencing and all the other ways He loves to engage me, that love must be the driving force behind everything I do.  I was thinking back to all the times that I was guided by love and those were certainly the most powerful moments.  The moment the Holy Spirit brought to the forefront was the time when I was in college working at a preschool.  There was a little girl there that was getting in trouble for "inappropriate touching" of another little boy.  The preschool director was agitated at this little girl and even reprimanding her with talk of even kicking her out, but I knew that it was due to abuse she encountered (Not sure if that was just from the Holy Spirit or gossip in the office.)  Well later that day I felt this overwhelming desire to go to the hallway.  Sure enough there was that little girl.  She had just left the restroom and it was just the two of us in the hallway at this point.  I wrapped my arms around her and told her that she was so loved by Jesus.  That she wasn't a "bad girl" at all and that I was so sad that she had been hurt by someone.  In fact, as I looked into her eyes I told her I understood her because I was abused when I was her age too.  I shed a few tears as did she.  She didn't say anything back.  I am sure at age 4 that would be hard to do anyway.  I have had other "moments" too. They have not been that exciting in regards to the miraculous, but that is where He is the one reaching through us to touch others for sure.

And so it may be completely "elementary" but may I never lose the awe and wonder of my "first love!"  Just recently I have started attending a small group (which isn't at all that small because there are 50 young adults in this group.)  I am so humbled by the purity of the hearts of many of these young men and women.  I was chatting with one last Sunday.  He has only been a Christian for a year and already he is so passionate about just being LOVE to a world that needs the love of Christ.  I wonder at why sometimes those of us that have been Christians for decades do not have even a portion of the passion and love that these do?  I think I used to make a few excuses, to justify my lack of zeal, that "those who have been saved of much love much."  Maybe because I was saved at such a young age was the cause of my complacency?  But perhaps it is simply because in my mind I had, in pride, decided that I was beyond living in that place of unashamed passionate love for Jesus.  I knew, with my head knowledge, that Jesus loved me and the world but I guess I thought it was time to move on to "bigger and better" things.  But what is "bigger and better" than His love?  There is nothing more important to offer and I need to allow Him to purge all things that get in the way of that, so I can truly BE love.  And as I work this out, what would living in His love actually look like?  Well the Bible lays it out pretty clearly.  It says that love is patient and kind, it doesn't envy or boast, it isn't self-seeking, it isn't easily angered and doesn't keep record of wrongs, it doesn't delight in evil but rejoices in truth, always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres, love never fails.  And the most profound thing of all is that this list is how Jesus actually loves us!  If I can really grasp how patient, kind, trustworthy, selfless, protecting my Savior is than it should just flow naturally to BE that to others.  And so, may we all grow to know the love of Christ so we can just fully live in it, and be the LOVE that He wants to be to this world.

Jesus is Cleaning My House Today

Jesus is cleaning my house today.

At first glance most people would think this article would be about a figurative "house cleaning"  but as I am writing this I am actually being blessed by having a house cleaner at my house today.  Her name is "Angelica" and she is more "Angelic" than even I could have ever known, but this story starts several days ago.

On Monday night I had a very hard time falling asleep. Our basset hound, Cookie, was whimpering around midnight.  I wasn't sure what she needed.  I made sure she had water and even put a few treats in her bowl (a really bad habit to get into I know) but I wasn't sure what she was upset about.  Finally she calmed down but by then I was exhausted and ready to sleep.  I had almost fallen asleep when I heard what distinctly sounded like a doorbell ringing.  It is midnight!  Who could be ringing the doorbell this at this hour?  But then my logical part of my brain informed me that it didn't sound like our doorbell.  Strange.  Maybe God was trying to tell me something then?  Lately I have been having some visions that have been very encouraging, some seem more real than others, and most are almost like dreams.  I like to joke that some people God can speak directly to but I need a "picture book!"  So after hearing the doorbell I thought, I guess I should answer it!  In my mind I walked to the door and opened it to see who was there.  When I opened it, there He was!  Jesus was standing on the other side of the door with a broom and a bucket and he had a huge smile on His face!  Now that is strange, and certainly the last thing I expected to see!  What could it mean?  I drifted off to sleep as I was pondering that thought.

The next day I was still thinking about the strange picture of Jesus I had the night before and trying to come up with an interpretation.  Maybe there were things Jesus needed to "clean up" in my life?  I am sure we all have things so I needed to pray about them and see.  I do struggle with cleanliness.  My Mom used to always say, "Cleanliness is next to Godliness."  I was shocked, but actually very relieved, to later learn that wasn't even a Bible verse!  What a relief because I would never be "godly" if outward cleanliness was a requirement.  But I could certainly use help in organizing.  But maybe it was deeper than just outward cleanliness?  Worry perhaps?  I do worry, especially now that I have a daughter at a private Christian university.  The cost is enough to keep me up at night..  Granted, God has been so faithful so far to provide in unexpected ways.  He gives us "our daily bread" as His Word says.  I am learning to rest in that, but it isn't something that comes easy to me.  What other things could be cleaned out?  Envy perhaps?  Maybe some anger, pride, impatience?  The list goes on.  Perhaps Jesus shouldn't have been smiling then if there were such things to clean out of my heart.  But He does discipline those He loves.  Sigh.  I read the Bible and then prayed for God to clean out whatever He willed.  Thank you Jesus for loving me enough to correct whatever it is that needs correction and to continuously help weed out things in my life.

I figured that was all He was trying to show me, until the doorbell actually rang!  I was about to leave the house to go work out at the gym. My friend had asked me to go meet her there and I really wanted to say no to the gym, but I figured it might be another way that the Holy Spirit was trying to help me "clean up" a bit with some self discipline in the area of exercise.  I went to the door thinking it was an Amazon package perhaps, my husband's favorite way to shop now, or perhaps some Jehovah's Witnesses?  When I go to the door I was surprised to see someone I hadn't seen in over 5 years!  It was my old housekeeper.  Her name is "Angelica."  We had to let her go when our youngest daughter was involved in gymnastics.   With her success in the sport the cost per month had put a huge dent in our budget and we needed to cut anything that was considered a "luxury."  As the years went on, it was hard to justify the cost of a housekeeper and expenses just kept growing as it does.

I asked Angelica how she was doing.  She said she was fine but she was looking for more work.  Many of her clients had left because they couldn't pay for her services as they had children in college.  I was about to tell her we couldn't afford her either for the same reason but I remembered my strange dream/vision I had a couple nights earlier.  I told her I would talk to my husband and let her know.  I took her card.  I watched her drive away in a car that looked like it had seen better days. Was Jesus trying to tell me to get a housekeeper? 

That night over dinner I told my family the strange story and coincidence.  Both my husband and daughter agreed that Jesus was totally right.  I was in desperate need of help!  They were halfway joking, but my husband agreed it wasn't something to ignore.  I told him that I thought at first the vision was just Jesus telling me to "clean out" some issues in my life but then the coincidence of my old house cleaner showing up was just too strange.  If Jesus wanted to provide a house cleaner than who am I to stop Him! I called Angelica that night.  She sounded so excited to work for me again.  Although I am not sure that spending the extra amount per month makes any sense right now, I just have to trust that God will provide as He always does and He always has. With the vision in my mind, it really feels like I am giving Jesus the job, as strange as that may sound, since He was the one at my door and she is the Angel that was provided.

My friend called me shortly after I got off the phone with Angelica.  I told her about the strange vision and that I had hired a housekeeper because of it. She then asked if I wanted to go to the gym the next day.  I said jokingly, "Only if I have a vision of Jesus showing up at my door with a treadmill!" 

Joy to India, the World, and God Willing America Too!

A month ago today I got back from an amazing and life changing two week trip to India.  India was one of the places in the world I said I "never" wanted to go to and I meant it with all sincerity.  The pictures I had seen of crowded streets, bustling cities and trains overflowing with people was enough to make me declare my intentions of never going, but I have learned that anytime I say the word "never" God takes that as a challenge with me.  I suppose He wants to keep me humble?  I am not sure, but much to my surprise my heart changed about going to India.  Perhaps it was in having some wonderful friends that I have made from there.  I also heard amazing stories from some of the ladies that went there from my church a couple years ago and I had heard the leader Suresh Kumar of Harvest India speak at a church and could feel his passion and heart for the people there and entertaining stories (which can be read in his book Compelled available on Amazon for a shameless plug).  When a lady at my church, who started a ministry called Daughters of the King, asked me if I was interested in going I had no excuse to give.  I knew instantly I was going!  God had changed me.  I will need to be more careful in my use of the word "never" from now on.

I had been on some mission trips before.  A few weekend trips to Mexico and a month long trip to Hong Kong, Taiwan and South Korea.  Those trips were instrumental in giving me a wider world view and understanding of how fortunate we are in the United States.  I came home with more gratitude and I would like to think more compassion for others.  So this time I was positive that I would have no trouble with two weeks in India.  It would be an adventure and I would go with many prayers behind me.  I must say that I did feel prayers sustaining me, and it was certainly an adventure!  But to say that I had "no trouble" isn't entirely true.  I found after two days of Indian food I was literally crying.  I am used to spicy Mexican food here in Southern California, but for some reason the spices were so unusual and I really was losing any taste for them and I felt like it would be too rude not to eat the food being presented to us and I actually cried hard.  Then to top it off, I could see how amazingly generous they were being to us in giving us such generous portions.  As we went to villages and handed out such simple things, such as an piece of bread, one hardboiled egg and a banana to have these children so overjoyed by this and I was crying over spicy food because I just didn't like it?  Not being able to throw toilet paper into the toilet was another issue I struggled with as well as a lack of hot showers.  I really suffered from some "first world problems" which was a bit eye opening.

But the thing that really changed me the most from this trip was joy.  I think in my mind I always knew that joy can be elusive.  As I look around me here in America it is rare to see true joy.  Sure there are some selfies posted with a smile and there is a sense in which people are happy when something good happens in their lives, but joy is something so much deeper and lasting than fleeting happiness.  While in India we served hot meals at the new church to 250 people that suffer from leprosy.  This is a disease that is preventable and totally curable with the right medical care.  Instead of being resentful and upset I saw something different in their eyes, pure joy and even contentment with their situation in life and gratitude for the simple things.  As I spoke at the conference we held for 500 women, mostly pastor's wives in small village churches, some of which had never even sat in a real chair or even had a meal that I was told would be one of the finest that they had ever been served (a meal with a selection of three different curries was what Harvest India provided) I saw pure joy in their eyes and they even danced for joy that we were there with them.  They gladly slept on the hard concrete floors during the three nights there.  I could not help but think that I would not be so content.  In fact, I already knew that I wasn't content with the meal of three different curries and even my soft mat in an air conditioned room (a true luxury in India) was not the comfort I was used to.    

The Bible speaks in 1 Timothy 6:6 of how "Godliness with contentment is great gain."  This is a verse I have contemplated many times in my life.   It is something I try to ponder when I am feeling discontent, which can be a common occurrence, I think more so in a hedonistic society that bombards us with messages of how we need to dress a certain way, drive a new car and entertain ourselves constantly.  But in India I saw what true contentment can bring.  They had very little but were content with that. Christmas is only a week away as I write this and it makes me think of the people in "Whoville" that were so content, even when the Grinch tried to steal Christmas from them.  In a way the Christians I met in India who have been "stolen" from by the neglect of their government or even the world at large, are joyful.  They sing praises to God and God is blessing them for that.  They are far richer in His presence than we are here.  They have learned the truth that His presence is better than any presents!   It is my prayer that we can have even a taste of the kind of joy I experienced there.

   

I knew that I might come back from India with a different perspective and I have.  As I walk the malls and the grocery stores and I see the luxury and abundance all around me but the faces of people seem stressed and unhappy it is a jarring observation that we need joy here.  We might have wealth, fleeting happiness on occasion but what we need is the joy that knowing Jesus can bring.  There are so many different messages.  We have been taught "the power is within" but really all that is within us is sin, pain and suffering.  The power is not in us at all.  The true "power" to change our hearts comes from a small baby that was born in a little town called Bethlehem.  He was God come to earth.  He came to walk with us, feel our pain and sorrow and then take our sin, the sin that keeps us from experiencing true joy, upon himself.  He paid the ultimate price for those sins on a cross for us.  Because of Jesus we have the only reason to sing, in America, in India, and everywhere,  Joy to the World the Lord has come!  

Jesus, the Ultimate Jewish Repairman

 

My washing machine broke this weekend.  It has been one of those seasons where it seems like things are constantly breaking.   My microwave stopped working a couple of months ago, my dryer needed a new belt a few weeks ago and this time it was my washing machine.  If only all of my appliances could break on the same day it would make life easier.  Or better yet, if they never broke at all!  But unfortunately it seems like it is just one of the annoyances we have to deal with in life.  

The repair man arrived, a friendly looking man in his late 50's with fly away blond hair and an earring on one ear.  He looked more like a rock star than a washer repair man but I was just happy someone had arrived to fix my machine.  He loved my dogs which was great because one of my dogs came from a shelter.  The shelter said that he was a Italian Greyhound mix.  The part the shelter left out was that it was mixed with Pit Bull.  He can be very aggressive and it makes me nervous any time I introduce him to people.  But both of my dogs really liked the washing machine repairman. If my dogs like him that is proof he must be a good fellow.  He was also very chatty and he had a noticeable accent that sounded Russian to me.  I asked where he was from and he said he was from the Ukraine.  I mentioned I had taken a Russian class once after my husband returned from a month long mission trip to Russia.  This of course intrigued him. 

After showing him my washing machine he quickly jumped in to work on it.  He seemed very happy to chat while he was working and it appeared he could multitask so I obliged and chatted with him while he was working.  He wanted to know more about my husband's trip to Russia.  I said that it was in 1991.   He responded, "Oh, the early 90's.  That was a good time to go.  Russia was pretty democratic at that point."   I said that my husband spent a month there and was handing out Bibles and starting churches.  I mentioned that people were even having fist fights over Bibles when they were being handed out.  This didn't surprise him at all. I learned that he had to leave Russia before the 90's because of religious persecution.  He was Jewish and he said I would not believe some of the things he had seen.  He did not appear to want to go into details, but from what I learned he had family members that had suffered through the Holocaust, and because of Stalin many of the their freedoms were taken from them and many family members were killed for their Jewish faith.  I agreed and said that there was no way I could ever really understand.  Unless you have gone through that kind of thing personally there is no way to really understand.  I said I could try to sympathize but that was really all I could do. 

He said that he was thankful to be in America now but that he was not a fan of Obama though.  He greatly lamented that he had some Jewish friends that voted for him.  He quoted Winston Churchill and said, “Show me a young Conservative and I'll show you someone with no heart. Show me an old Liberal and I'll show you someone with no brains.”  I laughed out loud at this and said that there was much truth in that!  I mentioned that he seemed very intelligent and he said that he had two college degrees. I said he should be teaching classes instead of repairing washing machines but he said that he had four grandchildren at home he spent time teaching.  I was still curious why someone with the life experience and depth of knowledge he appeared to have would be content with the mundane job of just fixing broken washing machines but the conversation moved on to other things. 

At this point he was fully aware of my Christian beliefs.  It isn't something I hide of course.  So he offered several interesting points to me.  One was that he believed in God and that he believed it really didn't matter what God you believed in or prayed to and that most religions have the basis of the Old Testament, specifically the 10 commandments, as the moral foundation for their beliefs.  I said there was definitely similarities in many religions. 

He did not give me any more time to talk and then jumped in with a story about how some Jehovah's Witnesses came to his door a while back.  I said, "They have some strange ideas."  He said, "Yeah right!?"  Then he said that the first time they came he pretended that he only spoke Russian.  A few weeks later some Jehovah's Witnesses that spoke Russian showed up at his door.  I laughed out loud at that!  He then said it was frustrating because they said that the Jews were God's chosen people.  So he said, "Then if we are chosen why do we need to become Jehovah's Witnesses?"  Of course I laughed at this.  His logic made sense to me.  I said that as Christians we do believe that the Jews are God's chosen people and that because of that I believe much of the persecution that the Jews have had to endure is in part because Satan hates them because of that and there is a giant target on their back, so to speak.  The repairman heartily agreed with me on this one. 

At this point I took the opportunity to mention that I had friends that are Jewish.  Although I anticipated what his response would be, I said "I have a very good friend that is a Messianic Jew!"  Just as I expected his response was a heated and frustrated, "Oh. Messianic Jews!"  Then he had to tell me the story when he was growing up his family was extremely angry at him over buying a "Jesus Christ Superstar" record.  He went on to explain how you can't really be Jewish and accept Jesus.

Then I said I had a question, a question I have had for a while.  Why is it that someone who is Jewish can accept basically anything?  They can dabble in Kabbalah, the occult, there are even atheist Jews, basically they can believe anything at all but accept Jesus.  Is it because of the experience that Jews have had with Christians?  He said that was it.  He said that during the Holocaust the Christians, primarily Catholics, did not help. I said that there were some Christians that did help though.  He agreed but said that 95% did not.  I said that just because the "church" did not help does not mean that Jesus still is not the Messiah.  Even the Old Testament prophesied that the promised Messiah had to have been born and lived at the time that Jesus Christ was on earth.  Even Jesus suffered at the hands of the church and was crucified. 

He thought for a brief moment.  He said, well if I accepted Jesus my father would probably kill me.  Then he thought for a moment and said, "It isn't like I do everything just because my father wants me to though."  Ah.  The wheels were turning.  I smiled and said, just something to think about.  He finished my washing machine.  I gladly paid him. He said, "Merry Christmas."  I said, "Happy Hanukkah."  I said I really enjoyed chatting with him.  I really did.  What a wonderfully intelligent and interesting man.  I do know God has a special place in his heart for the Jews.  Many have had to endure so much.  I would love to think that they could come "full circle" as I see it and understand who the promised Messiah is here on earth before they get to the other side, but I do feel like he was not rejecting Jesus.  He was just not sure yet.  He loved God, that I could see and I am so thankful that God does look at our hearts.  I will indeed pray that my Jewish repairman will at some point meet Jesus, the ultimate Jewish repairman!   There is plenty of things in this world that need to be fixed and we have the God given ability to do so, but we cannot fix our own souls.  Thankfully we can call on Jesus anytime :  the repairman for our souls and lost and broken world!

Seeing with Spiritual Eyes

Having spent many hours in debates on message boards, specifically with many atheists, I have come to the conclusion that much of what I have said and debated has fallen on deaf ears or "blind eyes."  There are some things that can only be seen with spiritual eyes.  The Bible even tells us that we were "once blind but now we see."  It should come as no surprise that when I am sharing truth from the Bible I have found that it will be perceived as foolishness to those that are not open to the things of God.  The question then leads me to ponder if these discussions are completely pointless or not.

Take some excerpts from my last discussion for example: 

Atheist: You seem to have blind faith in the bible and there is absolutely no way to know the accuracy of what was written in it.  Every religion has their own holy book, what makes your Bible valid and theirs invalid?

Me:  I have blind faith?  You may see it that way.  What is strange, and even supernatural, is that the Bible says that God will "Open the eyes of the blind."  In reality a person cannot see things spiritually until this happens.  Many people have said that the Bible did not make sense to them until they accepted Jesus and then it was like they could "see" things that they never saw before.  Although these experiences are not that common in my life, there have been some times in my life where I have "seen" sins that a person is struggling with the sole purpose of praying for that person.  I have seen visions.  I have also seen some people that I recognized were demon possessed just by feeling their presence in the room and then looked that direction and it was obvious that they "saw" me too!  A bit creepy but at the same time it just proved to me that I can see things in a spiritual way that many cannot.  The Bible is even said to be "foolish" to those that do not have the eyes to see. Instead of judging others for not seeing I really should not expect them to be able to.

I guess the thing that I would mention, in regards to your inference that the Bible is not true or it is just our "truth" is the question of why are so many people hostile to it?  If it wasn't so revolutionary why is it still banned in some places of the world?  Why has the Bible changed people's lives so much?  Why have people been willing to give up their lives for the truth in it, especially if it was not important?  Sure there are other religions that people give their lives for willingly, however, the one thing that separates Christianity from all other religions is that Christianity is the only religion that is not about earning our way to God.  In fact, it is all about realizing that there is no possible way to earn salvation at all.  It is about realizing that we are in need of help.  It takes humility and an open heart that prays and ask God to forgive us and "open our eyes" if you will to see things from God's perspective.  Then God, out of His great love, comes in and helps us to see not only ourselves, but others in a different way.  He helps us to love ourselves and others. He helps us to forgive, have joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, self-control.  He then gives us the gift of His Spirit in our hearts and then we are able to do good things because of His love, not because we are trying to earn our salvation but because we are so thankful for what He has done for us.  

Atheist: The placebo effect can be a very powerful thing.  A good example is those balance wristbands that say their holograms will make you have better posture, better at sports,  and so on.   But they actually are nothing but a piece of foil and some rubber, but the people wearing them believe in it so much that their brains make it true to them.  I'm not sure what you mean by saying that the possessed people "saw" you too, but 2 people looking at each other proves nothing supernatural.

People are hostile to any religion other than theirs in a lot of cases, or a specific religion because of the one they believe in, culture, etc.  In some places any religion except for the one of the state is banned, so does that mean every religion is valid?  The bible has changed people because they read it and thought they could be changed, coming back to the placebo effect.

Me:  I am not able to comment on everything right now but I do have a quick story to share regarding "seeing" people that are possessed.

What is strange is that I can feel their presence without seeing them first.  Then when I look the direction that the person is in they are often glaring at me with a sinister look.   My husband has a story that is more compelling though.  When he was in college he had a part-time job at an auto-parts store.  There was a strange guy that would come in on occasion and talk about Nostradamus and my husband noticed that he was possessed.  There was a very weird and dark spirit about him.  One day he was at work and he felt this guy's presence even though the guy was not in the store at the time.  My husband then commented to his co-workers "That Nostradamus guy is back."  The guy wasn't there so they said, "Where?"  My husband then sensed him near the 7-11 store next door and then pointed.  He sensed the guy walking and as his finger moved to where the guy was he was directly pointing at him when his figure appeared in the window walking by the store front.  His co-workers started freaking out and asking him how he knew that.  My husband just said it was easy.  He could "see" him or "sense" his evil or dark presence.  Having had this same experience I totally get it and understand it.  But it is something we can only "see" with our spiritual eyes.

And so the discussion has ended for now.  The atheist did not have a comment after I shared my husband's story (yet anyways.)  I figure the most important thing to do really is just pray.  Pray that the person reading the words will have a small desire, or even a curiosity in seeking more.  Really it takes God's Spirit to draw us to Him.  There is nothing brilliant enough that I could say to convince anyone otherwise.  So often these discussions lean towards "evolution and intelligent design" where I am treated as completely ignorant for even thinking that intelligent design was a possibility.  It seems to steer towards the question of if there was a God, why would He allow suffering and that is not the kind of God they would want to serve anyways.  Of course I explain that Christ suffered greatly too for us and that we have the free will to choose to love or harm others. But all of these discussions seem quite empty and most often end with no resolution.   Maybe a seed has been sown.  Maybe somewhere down the road a simple thing stated will cause them to ponder who God is in their lives.  I often try to intertwine personal stories because it is hard to argue with something that really happened to me, but even then I have to be a little thick skinned and not take an attack personally.  I suppose I need to consider it a compliment if I am hated for anything I say in defense of God's word.  I am in good company as I study the Bible for being laughed at and ridiculed.  So I continue to pray that I will see things through "spiritual eyes" and have the words to say that can open the eyes of the blind and lead them from darkness into light and that God's light will continue to shine brightly in and through me.